Never Ask Sabertooth to Plan You a Romantic Dinner
by cakelover2468
Summary: Sting found out the hard way. StiYu, for Estevamp4998's second writing challenge.


**Because this ship doesn't get as much attention as it should.**

"Yukino, marry me."

"No."

Sting stared at his best friend, aghast. "What do you mean no?! Why would you say something like that?!"

Rogue folded his arms across his chest. "Too direct. You'll scare her away."

The White Dragon Slayer threw up his hands, exasperated. "Then what am I supposed to do?! Quit rejecting all my ideas and help me already!"

Rogue sighed at his best friend's impatience. "You ask her out to dinner. Somewhere fancy or special to you two. It can even be a picnic, just choose something romantic. Talk a bit. Tell some jokes. Then, when you feel like it's the right time, you get down on your knees with the ring and pop the question."

"And when is that supposed to be?" Sting asked, staring as if Rogue was speaking Latin. Or Gibberish. Or Smart. Or any of those other languages that very few people know how to speak.

Rogue threw up his hands. "How am I supposed to know? Go with your gut!"

There was a snicker from the right (Sting's right, if you really want to be specific), and Lector flew up to them with Frosch. The two cats were each carrying a cookie.

"You're as clueless as Natsu-san!" Lector teased, taking a huge bite out of his cookie. The kind of huge bite that takes away like, half the cookie in one bite. (Yeah, the cat had a big mouth, in more ways than one.)

"Fro thinks so too!" Frosch agreed as he so often did, plopping down on top of Rogue's head. The Shadow Dragon Slayer instantly pulled the cat (frog?) off onto his shoulder, petting him.

"Aw, shut up," Sting grumbled, annoyed. "And where'd you get the cookies, anyway?"

"Yukino-san was baking some," Lector responded, finishing off his cookie with another bite. "Go ask her if you want one."

Sting's eyes positively lit up. "Cookies?!"

"Stay on topic, Sting," Rogue told him. "Remember, you've gotta figure out a way to do this."

"Right." Sting drooped for a second at the loss of his cookie, then suddenly brightened up. "Hey, what about right here? In the guild hall?"

"Here?" Rogue blinked. "Well, I mean, I guess, but it's not very romantic, now, is it?"

"I can change that." Sting grinned, ideas flying through his brain at top speed. "It'll be easy! You'll see!"

xXx

It was not easy.

The first problem was distracting Yukino. Obviously, she couldn't be let into the guild hall until it was ready. But how were they going to do that?

Miraculously, Lucy solved the problem for them.

Sting looked up as Yukino tapped him on the shoulder. "Hey, Yukino."

"Hi," she replied, smiling that brilliant smile of hers. "I was wondering, would it be okay if I spent the day with Lucy? She invited me over to Fairy Tail for some kind of Celestial Sprit party. I'll be back for dinner, though."

What Sting thought: _YES! THIS IS THE BEST OPPORTUNITY EVER OF COURSE YOU SHOULD GO! YESSSSS!_

What Sting actually said: "Huh? Oh, yeah, I guess that would be okay. I'll miss you, though."

She kissed his cheek. "I'll miss you, too. Actually, do you want to come? I'm sure Lucy wouldn't mind…"

"Uh, no, that's fine! I have stuff to do! Have fun!"

It technically wasn't a lie, he did have stuff to do. Just not the stuff she thought he was doing.

"Well, if you say so. Then I'll be going now!"

"Yeah, seeya!"

Sting waited until she was all the way around the corner, and another five minutes to be sure. Then he turned around and bellowed,

"All right! She's gone! Begin the preparations!"

And the preparations began.

xXx

The second problem came after Yukino returned.

She arrived just in time for dinner, just like she'd said she would. Sting was waiting nervously by the guild hall door, knowing that she always ate dinner at the guild nowadays. Probably to spend more time with her friends, though he wasn't sure if that was actually the case.

Just before she rounded the corner, Rufus slipped out and whispered, "No more candles."

Sting froze. "You sure?"

Rufus looked insulted. "Of _course _I'm sure. Remember what my magic is?"

Oh. Yikes. "Well… Improvise!"

Rufus shrugged, but obeyed.

Yukino rounded the corner, and her eyes lit up when she saw Sting. She ran the rest of the way.

"You waited?" she asked, smiling brightly.

"Of course," he replied. "Did you have a good time?"

"Yes! Lucy and her spirits were so fun! And Libra and Taurus…"

She chatted animatedly as he opened the door to the guild hall and led inside. The view struck her dumb.

It made Sting lose his voice too.

There were rose petals everywhere. Even glued to the ceiling. The table was covered with a hot pink tablecloth that clashed horribly with the green wooden chairs that some idiot in the guild had apparently thought was a good idea. Rufus stood in the corner, trying and utterly failing to play the violin. There was a fat baby that Sting faintly recognized as Natsu's and Lucy's in the opposite corner wearing a strange-looking pink cupid outfit. (Apparently someone else had been to Fairy Tail that day.) On the table, a yellow glowstick jammed into the candleholder gave off a soft glow.

Sting couldn't look at Yukino. Mostly because he was glaring daggers at the rest of his guildmates, who were grinning back at him like idiots.

You had to give Yukino credit, though. The girl just plastered on a smile and sat down in one of the green chairs as if nothing was wrong.

Sting sat down too. It wasn't as if he had a choice.

"It looks…very interesting," she commented, looking around. "Rufus, when did you learn how to play the violin?"

"I read about it in a book," was the reply. "Do you like it?"

"Um."

Rufus took that as a no and slipped out.

Orga walked in, carrying a platter. "Your meal, lady and (coughcoughcoughchoke) gentleman."

Sting glared at the Black Lightning's feeble attempts not to laugh. Orga instantly shut up. The guild master was a terrifying man when crossed.

"Ahem. I'll just leave now."

Sting plastered a fake smile on his face and took a look at the food.

Heart-shaped hamburgers. _Heart-shaped hamburgers._

_Who the heck decided all this idiotic stuff anyway?!_

Sting took a deep breath. Since everything was screwed up already, he'd might as well get it over with. "Yukino…"

"_FAIRY WHERE'RE YOU GOING I'LL COLLECT ALL OF THE LIGHT!"_

They both jumped a foot in the air as the music shook the room, pounding from a huge set of speakers Rufus had dragged in. Sting didn't think his system could register any more shock, but his jaw dropped anyway.

"SINCE YOU DIDN'T LIKE THE VIOLIN, I BROUGHT YOU SOME BETTER MUSIC!" Rufus yelled over the singing, looking extremely pleased with himself.

Sting wondered if it would be impolite to excuse himself so that he could kill the Memory Make wizard.

And then the room exploded in foam.

Sting faintly heard the sounds of Rogue yelling over the sounds of the music and his shock. "NO, I SAID NOT NOW! THE BUBBLE MACHINE WASN'T SET TO LOW YET!"

Yukino looked as if she didn't know whether to laugh or pass out from shock.

Sting finally found his voice. "TURN IT OFF!"

The music died away. The foam stopped flooding the room. Everything went silent.

Sting couldn't look at Yukino. "Uh. Yukino…"

And then she started laughing.

He stared as she cracked up, tears of laughter streaming down her cheeks. "You… You did all this for me?"

_She still wasn't mad?_

Seeing as he probably wasn't going to get a better chance, like, ever, Sting reached into his pocket and…

The ring was gone.

He froze.

Then Lector tapped him on the leg. "Looking for this?"

He held out the missing ring.

Sting wanted to give his cat a million fishes, but priorities first, so he just flashed him a smile and got down on his knees.

"Yukino," he said. "I know this was the stupidest attempt ever, and you probably think I'm a Grade-A weirdo and a jerk, but do you want to marry me?"

She stared at first, uncomprehending, but then her eyes widened and her eyes filled with tears (again).

Sting was beginning to wonder if he had a talent for making his girlfriend cry.

But then that thought vanished when she yanked him to his feet, threw her arms around him, and whispered,

"I do. I do."

Sting's mind was reeling, but he still managed to grin like an idiot.

And then the guild erupted in cheers.

xXx

The day after that, the master of the Sabertooth guild mysteriously ordered a truckload of fish to be delivered to his home. It greatly confused the fishermen, but they shrugged it off.

After all, who really knew how those wizards thought, anyway?

**Fics like this aren't really up my alley, but the prompt said, so whatever. I hope I didn't fail too badly.**

**Water, out**


End file.
